You're on "Coast-to-Coast" with George Noory, and for one hour you’ve debated George’s other guest, who is an expert on where Noah’s Ark landed on Mount Ararat. He has scripture and physical proof, and never mind that the proof has long been identified as wood splinters from a railroad tie in Long Beach.

After the other guest fields a question about how many sasquatches boarded the ark, George says, "Well, gentlemen, that is a fascinating story. And…to be continued." The party's over. George adds, "Thank you for coming on our show," and you say, "Thanks for having me," which sounds like your five-year-old daughter leaving a sleepover. We all need a more gracious, eloquent, adult way of saying goodbye on the air. It’s the hardest part of our 15 fame minutes. The trick is to say something that will get us invited back, so we can extend those minutes, because, you must have heard, there will be a prize for the most minutes.

So what do you say? "It's my pleasure, George. You ask great questions." I don't think so. You say, "Great, George, great, a transcendent show, a real pleasure to be with you. Next time, I want to talk to your three million listeners about the word 'as.'" See what I mean? Now George gets excited. "Will one hour be enough, or should I tell my producer to block out two?" That's the way it works.