Choosing the right pronoun to use when writing is harder than you might expect. Some pronouns serve several functions; some pronouns don’t change to show number or gender, and others seem redundant. There’s also social pressure to sound “sophisticated.” It’s no wonder writers are confused! Let's explore the proper usage of reflexive pronouns and first-person pronouns.
One source of confusion is that, in middle school, our teachers told us not to use I in academic writing. Some teachers argued that using I sounded self-centered and uneducated; other teachers gave this advice to help students avoid giving weak opinions. Despite these good intentions, we now have a hard time knowing when to use me, myself, or I when we speak and write.
Here are some quick examples of correct and incorrect sentences with I, me, and myself. If you’re confused or curious about why they are right or wrong, read more below.
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Incorrect |
Correct |
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If you need help, call Bob or myself. |
If you need help, call Bob or me. |
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Bob and myself made the decision. |
Bob and I made the decision. |
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The decision was made by Bob and myself. |
The decision was made by Bob and me. |
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Bob helped Jane and I. |
Bob helped Jane and me. |
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Bob helped Jane and myself. |
Bob helped Jane and me. |
Before we get into the complexities of personal pronouns, let’s refresh our memory on things we think we already know. Linguists usually focus on spoken language, so this article talks about “the speaker,” but these rules are the same for speaking and writing in English.
You’ve probably heard of first-person pronouns. First-person singular pronouns are I, me, my, and mine. They stand in for the name of the person speaking. Languages have these pronouns so speakers don’t have to keep saying their own names!
In a sentence like, “I walk,” the speaker (I) is the person doing the action. The I pronoun shows the subject or the actor. The speaker is the person acting in the sentence. In these cases, use I. (Technically, this usage is called nominative case.)
In a sentence like, “Bob called me,” the speaker (me) is the person receiving the action. That’s why the speaker uses a different pronoun. Something is happening to the speaker or is about the speaker, but the speaker is not acting in the sentence. Here, the correct pronoun is me. (Technically, this usage is called objective case in English.)
In a sentence like, “I trust myself,” the speaker is the person acting and receiving the action. That’s why the speaker says myself. Myself is a reflexive pronoun.